Letting Go

The last several months have been exciting and trying and emotional and stressful and…..a real opportunity to let go of so many things…….many of them material, but also to let go of weight. I mentioned earlier that I recently got promoted to a new position and over the past several months, a couple of friends have helped me let go of so many material things. They were things I didn’t need but wanted at the time and then it was too difficult for me to give them away on my own. 

It was such a shame because much of it was never used. Thank the Lord they are now blessing others. My point is that I was holding on to things that weren’t mine. They were probably never meant for me, but for them to pass through me to others. Yes, now they have them, but how might they have been blessed with those items earlier. Yes, we are to operate in God’s timing (Lam 3:25-26), but do we on occasion slow down our process of maturation by holding on to things from our past that prevent us from being free and moving into our next space? I believe so. I believe we are our greatest obstacle. I believe we get in our own way more than the devil can ever harm us. 

I recently learned that my desire to make my family and friends proud and never be ashamed of me was placing me in bondage. I wasn’t free to operate for fear that I would somehow disappoint those closest to me and that my performance was why they loved me. Some would say that’s ridiculous and I would have said the same thing….about someone else and until I realized, it was a huge motivating factor in my life. Now, I understand it was a blind spot for me. Now that it’s in the open, I’ve more conscious of when I’m performing for acknowledgement. I’m letting go of the weight of that. I don’t have to carry it. I’m to work as unto the Lord and the rest will take care of itself (Col 3:23-24). 

I can let go of all the stuff and all the weight. He gives us grace for what He has for us to do (2 Cor 12:9). The question is how much will we give Him (1 Pet 5:7-9)? If we hold onto it too, He’ll back off because we might get it twisted and confused that we had something to do with the ultimate outcome. Our letting go of the material and mental things that hold us back, allows us to see more clearly. It allows God space to move in our lives, where we’ve kept it filled before. 

I don’t know about you, but I want all that God has for me. I don’t want to be the reason that I miss out of His purpose and His plan. It can definitely be scary walking into the unknown but God is already there, so what is there to fear. Even when I don’t know, He does (Isa 46:10). 

I encourage you to take stock of your life and let go of those things (whether material, mental, or spiritual) that are holding you back and step out into your future with God. Given all the stories in the bible when God’s followers stepped out in faith (where He directed them) and were blessed beyond measure, I feel honored that He’d choose me for this particular journey. I thank Him that I’ll now be a bit lighter on this next leg of the journey. On your next leg, I hope you will be, too. Be blessed.

How to Forgive

A few years ago, I wrote a blog entry entitled “Who do you need to forgive?” I just re-read it and it was a good lesson in identifying the person(s) you need to forgive and why. If you need a little help with that, it may just bless you, so check it out.  

What I didn’t delve into was how to forgive. Forgiveness is easy to talk about but more difficult to do. That is compounded when you don’t really have a plan to follow. I’m no expert on the topic, but I have been in situations where it was hard to forgive an offense and I have sought help from the Holy Spirit in those cases to forgive and move forward. Between that and my study of the subject, I’ve found a few tips that may help you as they are helping me. 

Before we get too far, let’s recap what forgiveness is. Generally speaking according to psychologists, forgiveness is a conscious, deliberate decision to release feelings of resentment or vengeance toward a person or group who has harmed you, regardless of whether they actually deserve it.  Forgiveness doesn’t mean that you forget or condone the offence, but it does mean letting go of the anger that can be exceedingly corrosive in your life.  

So, if forgiveness is a choice, we can choose to do things that we may not really feel like doing. I’ve learned in so many areas of my life, my feelings don’t drive change. I have to make a conscious decision to act and then my feelings will follow suit. For instance, I never feel like exercising. I know I need to do it, but I don’t especially like it.  So in most cases, I do it despite my feelings not because of them. I make a conscious choice to get out of bed and work out. When I do, I always feel better when I’m done. My feelings follow my actions. That too is often how forgiveness works. We begin to act in forgiveness and then our feelings line up. 

So the first tip is to pray for those who’ve hurt you. I know you may not want to do it, or you may want to pray bad things happen to them or pray God’s wrath on them. No!  Pray that God will help you forgive them and that He will forgive and bless them (Mark 11:25). Jesus is our example. Even on the cross after He had been beaten and ridiculed and pushed and everything imaginable, He still asked God to forgive His enemies because they didn’t recognize what they were doing (Luke 23:34). He still showed love and compassion for those who hurt Him. 

The next tip is to remember how you have been forgiven. None of us deserve to be forgiven even when we apologize. It’s freely given from God when we ask, because God the Father, is love (1 John 4:16). His abundant loves pours out on us and we were directed by Jesus to love our neighbor as ourselves. We want to be forgiven, so we too must forgive. Just as God chooses to forgive us, we can choose not to hold an offense against another person who has wronged us whether they are sorry or not (Matt 5:43-44). 

Finally, we should consider how life has shaped the other person. I struggle with this one sometimes especially in a world where racism and sexism and abuse and hatred appear to be on the rise. But, when you think about how many people are “living their truth” having rejected the love of God the Father and God the Son, it makes me sad for them and more compassionate. People can say anything, but their actions tell the truth about who they are. If they don’t show love, then according to the bible they don’t know God (1 John 4:8). That’s His word, not mine. So, it makes me sad for them even in their cruelty or their hate, because they don’t have the peace or joy that knowing God the Father through our relationship with Jesus and the Holy Spirit brings. Frankly, I don’t understand how people function without them. But this leads me back to the first tip, praying for those who’ve hurt me. 

Remember, forgiveness is about you letting go of the burden and the weight of holding the offense against someone. It sets you free. So, do you want to be a victim or a victor? The choice is yours. 

Write the Vision and Make it Plain!

Habakkuk 2:2 tells us to write the vision and to make it plain. In order to follow that instruction, we must first understand what vision is. From my study, vision is a supernatural revelation from the Lord with can teach a spiritual truth or convey future happenings. So, one question is what is the Lord telling you about your life or your ministry or your career, etc.? What possibilities have you shot down without even really considering them? What is holding you back? 

Recently, I began crafting a vision for my new job or rather for my new region as a whole. I had to seek God for the possibilities of what could or should be. When I put it on paper, it didn’t completely resonate with me, so I had to tweak it until the meaning settled over me like a warm blanket. I needed to be comfortable and settled with the vision, understanding that to achieve it I would have to go outside my comfort zone. There was nothing easy about it except writing it down, and it wasn’t completely easy to articulate the vision. 

Some would say, “Just do it.” That might work, but if you don’t write the vision down, you’re dependent upon your memory of what the true vision was. You might hit it, but how far off might you be without having that evidence of the vision somewhere you can reference it. It’s the same for your goals and plans. If they are in your head, they are fragile and may get cloudy. Once they are on paper or your electronic notebook, you have something solid to lean on. When you get discouraged, you have something to go back to and can encourage yourself (1 Sam 30:6). When things aren’t going according to plans, you have something on which to focus to keep you on track. 

Writing the vision is the first step to real success. You can always go back to it as you move forward to see where you are in regards to the vision. It can become your measuring stick. As always, the Lord opens doors and windows, but we have to be prepared to walk through them. Writing the vision puts us in a place to recognize the opportunities when they come. It also helps to prepare us to take advantage of them. When we write the vision, we are expecting those doors and windows to open. We’re looking for them. 

If you haven’t done so, I challenge you to take some time and seek the Lord for His vision for your life or whatever aspect of your life you need to move in (Prov 3:5-6). I know I’m headed into an awesome adventure from pursuing the vision God has given me. I hope you have the courage to do the same. Write the vision so it’s plain to you and anyone else who needs to walk along side of you. 

Remember, even if it’s scary - we do it scared. God has us and He won’t let us go!

What Message Are You Sending?

I've recently been in leadership training and it was amazing. Much like an intense college quarter with assignments and classes and presentations, but so much more than that. One of the take away lessons was that our words create worlds. When we speak something, we or someone else gets instruction or encouragement or guidance and it paints a picture or takes us on a journey. 

Think about the last time someone read you a book or instructions for putting something together - those words created a picture in your mind or a movie as to how it would all come together. Our words do the same. That gives us a responsibility to be clear and concise and mean what we say. When we promise a child that we'll do something with them, we create a world of excitement and anticipation. What happens when we don't show up? They are disappointed and just a little less trusting of us the next time. We have eroded their trust. That doesn't just happen with children. What about when we speak poorly of people? What does that do to their self-esteem? We have to be careful to build up and not break down (Eph 4:29).

The Bible states that life and death are in the power of the tongue (Prov 18:21). Life and death are in our words. We speak things positively or negatively. We create worlds with our words. What words are you speaking? Are you always talking about how bad things are? If so, that is all you'll see. Are you speaking of the positives in life? If so, you'll see the half full glass and not the half empty one. No one is suggesting that you not be realistic or tell the truth, but there are different ways to describe the truth. 

One person may say it's a cloudy day, while another may say the Sun is just behind the clouds - both statements are true. But one sounds more optimistic. If the Sun is just behind the clouds, we can expect it to come out anytime. We are reminded it will shine again. Are you providing hope or despair with your words? 

Next time you are sharing with someone think about what you are saying and how you are saying it. Try to couch it in realistic optimism. Realistic optimism is the ability to balance out negative and positive things in situations, circumstances and people. We all need hope and joy. Let's use our words to bring as much of that as possible to the world. 

Are You a Strategist?

How often are you given an assignment or a project and you tackle it the way you always have? No thought to ways that may be better or more impactful, just doing it the same way you always have. No thought to challenging the status quo. How often have you thought to stop and consider whether there is another way, a better way? Over the past few weeks, I've learned that I'm a great tacticion - I execute actions well. I have not been a great strategist - thinking strategically, implementing and evaluating regularly. 

A tactician is a person who uses a carefully planned strategy to achieve a specific end. A strategist is a person skilled in planning the action or policy to achieve a specific end. So a tactician does the work and a strategist determines how best to get it done. As I mentioned I'm a great tactician and I'm not a bad strategist when I take the time to actually plan instead of going right into the doing (Prov 21:5). And being one who gets things done is great - it's taken me far. A strategist can go so much further, because they are not doing the work themselves - they are making and writing plans so others can take up the mantle and join them in the effort (Hab 2:2). 

What is it you want to accomplish or that God is leading you to accomplish? Who do you need to take with you? What resources do you need to get there? What has worked in the past? What could be better? What could go wrong and how do you reduce those risks? These are just a few of the questions a strategist would ask, while the tactician is already working on doing what's been done for years. It may work, but could it have more impact? Could it be done faster? Could it be done cheaper? Could it be done better? 

I believe all of us want to leave our world a bit better than we found it. In order to do so, we need to have a plan that not only ourselves but those around us can follow. Little of what we do or have is about us. Our purpose is to point those around us to Christ. So He should be incorporated in everything we do. We have to be intentional and consider our strengths and weaknesses, as well as, external forces that may impact the outcome. We will face opposition and challenges, but what will we do about them? A good plan should account for most of those. Where do we go for help with plans? To the Lord, who has a plan for us (Jer 29:11). If we ask Him for wisdom, he will give it. He also tells us to seek wise counsel (Prov 12:15, 11:14, 15:22). We don't have all the answers and a good strategist knows that.  He/she is willing to listen to others to get to the best possible outcome. 

I don't know if you're a tactician or a strategist, but I encourage you to consider the latter. I'm working on it myself and while it may take a long time, I can't wait to see the harvest. Be blessed. 

How Resilient Are You?

Everywhere I turn I hear about the bad things happening in the world. Just last night there was mass shooting with 10 people killed and several wounded. Apparently, the gun man is still at large. While we don't know the motive, we do know that 10 people have lost there lives because someone could not find a better way to voice their issues. It is a travesty in this country of plenty that anyone would take lives that are no threat to theirs. How do we bounce back from incidents like this? How do we cope? 

When things like this happen, I turn to my Father in heaven who knows everything and is ultimately in control of the outcome of every situation. Yes, we have free will do to what we want to do, but God will hold us accountable for our choices - both good and evil. In Romans, Paul tells us not to avenge ourselves. "Vengence is Mine, I will repay," says the Lord (Rom 12:19). Make no mistake, no matter what it looks like, no one will get away with the evil deeds they do. They may not face consequences where we can see it, but they will pay. 

So if we can't take action against the one who wronged us, how do we cope with situations for our own wellbeing? We pray for peace and for God to help us forgive. Remember, forgiving is not the same as forgetting. We never forget the things that hurt us the most, but we can chose to not hold it against a person. It doesn't mean we have to put ourselves in a situation with them again. We forgive because God forgives us (Matt 6:14-15). We forgive for ourselves so we don't grow bitter and hard - that takes a lot of work and we have more important things to focus on. We are to love God first and our neighbor as ourselves. In order to do that, we have to release ourselves from the anger and let the hurt go. That's the only way for us to be whole. 

Resilience is the ability to withstand or recover quickly from difficult situations. So, how do you recover from difficult situations? Do you take time to reflect on the situation and how God is moving on your behalf? Do you put strategies in place with the wisdom of God to address the obstacles? Do you choose to trust that as you move in God's will and trust Him that the situation will work out? Or, do you speak defeatist? Do you consider that you are done? Do you speak negatively over your life (Prov 18:21)? Yes, bad things happen to each one of us. But we can choose how we will respond - if we get up and keep moving or if we give up. Don't give up. If you accepted Jesus as savior and belong to the Lord, He is working on your behalf even when you can't see it. 

Don't ever doubt that He has you. God gives us the ability to bounce back through the power of the Holy Spirit, if we let Him. So, how resilient are you? I pray you will put on the whole armor of God and allow the Lord to strengthen you so you can withstand the forces of the devil (Eph 6:11-13).

You Can!

When was the last time you attempted something that was hard and outside your comfort zone? How did it go? Did you keep going until the end or did you quit because it challenged you? How committed were you in completing the task or the program or the race? While ability definitely plays a part in the outcome, I've found that my commitment and dedication to anything (with the Lord's help) is the determining factor in whether it gets done or not. What this means is that we really can do anything through Christ, we just have to know that we can. 

So, what is God calling you to that you haven't walked into yet? What have you been afraid to try? What has been holding you back? No, what has really been holding you back? Fear? Time? Money? Skill? Other obstacles? What are you doing to face your fears? What actions have you taken to remove them or to limit them? What time sucks can be reduced? What things can you live without buying? What skill do you need to develop? What are you really called to do? What will you commit your time, money and skills to do? We can do what we are called to do if we will just do it. 

God has already told us to be strong and courageous and promised to always be with us (Josh 1:9). Further, the scriptures tell us to wise with the use of our time (Eph 5:15-17). Where we put our money and other treasure is where our heart is (Matt 6:21). As for our skills, if we develop our skills, we will stand before people in high positions (Prov 22:29). If these scriptures are true, and they are, what decisions and actions are you taking that prevent you from moving forward? What excuses are you telling yourself to justify why you haven't moved forward? 

All of us have things that come against us, but with the Lord's help we can overcome them all. We are overcomers (Rev 3:21). We are the only real thing holding us back. If you could not fail, what would you do? There is no failure in God (Luke 1:37). We either have faith and trust that or we don't. Believe it and walk into what He has for you. You CAN!