What Does Your Love Life Look Like?

We have all these views about what love is and what it’s not.  For some, it’s agreeing with whatever they say.  For some, it’s doing whatever they want.  Usually, it’s about what “I” can get out of someone or what they can give “me”.  

But real love, true love is all about what “I” give.  Love is all about the actions I take, even when I don’t feel like it (1 Cor 13).  I recently listened to a video about Love and Truth potentially being in conflict as I was assisting in a middle school ministry class.  I learned a lot from that video.  The narrator explained that Real Love is treating people the way God treats us through Jesus – better than we deserve and always for our good (Rom 8:28).  That is what God has called us to do when He says to love our neighbors as ourselves.  

I don’t know about you, I find I fall short on that. I know I love Jesus and I say I love people, but I don’t know that I always treat people better than they deserve and always for their good.  To be frank, I can be selfish and forget sometimes that things are not all about me.  I don’t do it often (I try to stay in God’s word which keeps me humble), but sometimes I get a little too full of myself and forget that I’m not all that.  

Yes, God loves me….way more than I deserve.  Yes, He provides for me….way more than I need.  He is always good to me, even when I’m on punishment (Heb 12:6-8).   Even that is because He loves me and wants me to grow and mature.  That is what real love looks like…..putting in the work and the time.  

When I think of how Jesus loved when he walked the earth – He spent time alone time with God and then He spent time pouring out to people, whether teaching, healing, feeding, or whatever else.  He was always giving of Himself to make someone else’s life better.  He also allowed people to minister to Him – He received from them.  We are blessed in our giving and our loving.  The two great commandments are loving God with all of your heart, soul and mind; and loving your neighbor as yourself (Matt 22:36-40).  Are you showing the love of Christ to others?  How?  If Jesus were to return in the next instant, would He be pleased with how you are obeying this directive?  How is your love life? 

Exposure is Key!

Ever had someone tell you they didn’t like something, but when further questioned you found out they had never tried it? I have.  And, I’ve realized we often make snap judgements about things without having experienced them.  When we haven’t been exposed to things it’s difficult to really know how we will react to them.  It’s scary sometimes to try new things especially when we don’t know much about them.  It’s also difficult to dream about something that we’ve never seen or been exposed to.  

I watched a Hallmark movie this weekend (my guilty pleasure) and they did an amazing job of addressing some sensitive issues around race in an interracial family.  In the movie, a little girl mentioned that she thought she had selected the wrong instrument (a violin) because she had not seen a violinist who looked like her.  That grabbed me.  I thought of all the times I felt like I might not belong or I might be in the wrong place, because I was the only one. 

And I realized that the more exposure I had to the Lord, the more He ordered my steps (Psalm 37:23).  He was directing my path and I was exactly where I was supposed to be.  I wasn’t like Joseph dreaming of things I had never seen or experienced, but I was moving into areas I never really imagined.  God had plans for me that I didn’t know and the more exposure and time I spent with him, the more I stepped into areas that were outside my comfort zone and the more I saw God’s favor (Matt 6:33).  The more I trusted Him, the more I knew it was Him getting me through things.  The more I trusted Him, the stronger my faith, because I knew I could not do it on my own.  He chose me.  He set me apart.  

I don’t know what it is you haven’t been exposed to that you are to walk into, but don’t let fear or ignorance keep you from taking the next step.  Be exposed to the one who created you and know He has a plan for you…..a plan to prosper you and not harm you (Jer 29:11).  Be exposed!

Look for the Good!

So, last week I took my first flight since COVID began.  I know, people have been flying all along and it shouldn’t be a big deal.  However, I’m a safety and health professional and since I understand the science around COVID, I just hadn’t felt comfortable about being on a plane for hours.  All that said, I bit the bullet and took a trip to hang out with a girl friend from college.  I hadn’t seen her in about 5 years and we were overdue to hang out and catch up.  I also had plans to see another good friend during the trip.   

To say the least, it was an interesting trip.  Let me lay it out for you.  I got to the airport Saturday morning and after getting through the chaos was able to find a parking space in a remote part of the parking lot.  The crowds were crazy and we had to wait for a while for a shuttle to the terminal, but we got there and after I checked my bag, it was a relative breeze through security (thanks CLEAR) and then just the wait until the plane boarded…..except it didn’t.  My flight was CANCELLED, not delayed, but cancelled…..10 minutes before we were to take off.  So after taking a few deep breaths and calling Delta to try and rebook my flight, I found out there was not another flight to get me to my destination on Saturday.  So a quick trip to baggage found that I had been rebooked and couldn’t get my checked bag back.  So the airline held onto my bag with the intention of sending it when I flew the next day.  So, I went home, got into my PJs to relax.  A few hours later, I got a call back from Delta and the agent rebooked me again on a direct flight (since the automatic rebooking was a flight with a layover).  She also confirmed that my bag would fly with me the next day, which would have been great except I got a text a few hours later informing me that my bag was on the carousel at my destination.  Thankfully, the airline had it and held it for me.

Sunday morning was a return trip to the airport after a great night’s sleep in my own bed.  I found an easy parking space upfront, got picked up within a couple of minutes of parking, breezed through security, and boarded the plan with no issues.  We took off on time.  I watched two movies on the flight and we arrived with no issues.  I went straight to baggage and picked up my bag which was waiting for me and was checking in my hotel shortly thereafter.  It was a one of the easiest trips I’ve taken.  The chaos on Saturday could have caused me to through in the towel for the entire trip, but when my flight was cancelled, I focused on the Lord and His plans for me. See, I don’t believe in coincidence – I believe everything happens for a reason. So, given that - what might He have been protecting me from – dangers seen and unseen (Psalm 91)?  Was this an opportunity for me to get some much needed rest?  What else could He be doing? I don’t know and I ultimately don’t need to.  God is in control and if I focus on Him, I can see the good coming out of even the most chaotic of situations (Rom 8:28).  One thing about this life is for us to stay open to the possibilities of things being different than we expect and continue pressing forward. 

Yes, the beginning of the trip was totally unexpected and somewhat frustrating, but I had the best time with a couple of really good friends that I otherwise would have missed.  After the initial issues, I appreciated the trip even more.  So, when you experience frustrating or even disappointing moments, keep your focus on the Father and look for the good in those moments.  It’s always there.

Be Yourself!

Ever read someone’s entry on Facebook, Twitter or Instagram and it made you question where you are in life or made you a little insecure?  I have.  Questions and insecurities arise when we compare our life to those of others. We consider how they are farther ahead than we are or that they passed hurdles we face or they’ve accomplished something significant and it makes us wonder if we are good enough.

The answer is “Yes.” Last week, we realized that God chose us for a specific purpose and plan (Eph 12:4).  Today, I want to encourage you to accept that God wants us to be ourselves.  Not the self we create in our desire to be liked or appreciated by people nor the fake self who hides the real parts of themselves to prevent being hurt.  When we hear we are fearfully and wonderfully made, what does that mean to us?  Are we thinking human beings are fearfully and wonderfully made? Or, we, individually and personally, are fearfully and wonderfully made?  

When God created us for His purpose and plan, He gave each of us specific gifts and abilities to utilize (Rom 12:6).  Yes, He expects us to develop them to the fullest, but no two of us are created identically….even identical twins. Each one of us is unique and special – not better than anyone else – just different.  Because we are different, each person one of us has a specific role to play that is best played by us.  No two people are the exact same combinations of traits and abilities.  

God wants us to use those capabilities He put on the inside of us to proclaim the Gospel wherever we go.  In order to do this we have to be honest about who we are and recognize we can’t define ourselves – God does because He made us (1 Cor 12:6).  I recently read a devotional about being yourself and I’ll paraphrase – Be the best “You,” you can be.  The world needs what God created you to do.  Don’t try to be anyone else – yes, we can learn from others, but the only one we should imitate is Jesus.  Even Paul instructed the Christ followers in Corinth to follow his example, as he followed the example of Christ (1 Cor 11:1).    We can only be truly ourselves when we are tied to the Creator and understand (and accept) what He says about us.  Who are you trying to be?

We are Chosen

I recently read a devotional about how being chosen makes us feel as if we belong and that we’re accepted and special.  Have you ever been selected for something?  Were you excited? I know I have been.  

Those of us who are Christ followers, should feel even more excited.  Think about it.  We were fearfully and wonderfully made by our Father, the Creator of the universe….in His image.  Not only did He create us, but He chose us before the beginning of time (Eph 1:4-5).  He knew we would be where we are right now and He created us with a specific assignment in mind.  Because He gives us the will and power to please Him (Phil 2:13), we just have to obediently follow His leading.  Take a look in the mirror and for everything you identify as a fault or a blemish, remember that God created you to look the way you do.  He set you in your family and gave you the personality traits you have with His purpose in mind.  He CHOSE you (Matt 22:14!  

Even when we choose things separate and apart from Him, He chose us.  He knows who we are and what we’ll do and how we will respond and yet, He chose us anyway.  How does that make you feel?  It makes me feel loved and accepted.  It also makes me want to be more genuinely myself.  That doesn’t mean that I get to define who I am…..I don’t.  I didn’t make myself and I can’t remake myself….I have to surrender to God’s leading and molding and the more I trust and obey Him, the more I become who He created me to be.  Yes, it requires work on my part…but He is there with me every step of the way.  

This is refreshing and comforting to me…..I don’t have to keep trying to do things all by myself.  If I surrender to God’s direction and leading, He will direct me on the path that will lead to my most abundant life…..not necessarily the life I have planned for myself, because He is bigger and better than anything I can imagine on my own.  I don’t know about you, but I want all God has for me, because that will be the most fulfilling life I can have.  God chose me for a specific reason and I want to walk it out because I want to see where He’s taking me and I want to please Him (John 15:16).  I don’t want to miss a minute of what He has for me.  What about you?