Letting Go

The last several months have been exciting and trying and emotional and stressful and…..a real opportunity to let go of so many things…….many of them material, but also to let go of weight. I mentioned earlier that I recently got promoted to a new position and over the past several months, a couple of friends have helped me let go of so many material things. They were things I didn’t need but wanted at the time and then it was too difficult for me to give them away on my own. 

It was such a shame because much of it was never used. Thank the Lord they are now blessing others. My point is that I was holding on to things that weren’t mine. They were probably never meant for me, but for them to pass through me to others. Yes, now they have them, but how might they have been blessed with those items earlier. Yes, we are to operate in God’s timing (Lam 3:25-26), but do we on occasion slow down our process of maturation by holding on to things from our past that prevent us from being free and moving into our next space? I believe so. I believe we are our greatest obstacle. I believe we get in our own way more than the devil can ever harm us. 

I recently learned that my desire to make my family and friends proud and never be ashamed of me was placing me in bondage. I wasn’t free to operate for fear that I would somehow disappoint those closest to me and that my performance was why they loved me. Some would say that’s ridiculous and I would have said the same thing….about someone else and until I realized, it was a huge motivating factor in my life. Now, I understand it was a blind spot for me. Now that it’s in the open, I’ve more conscious of when I’m performing for acknowledgement. I’m letting go of the weight of that. I don’t have to carry it. I’m to work as unto the Lord and the rest will take care of itself (Col 3:23-24). 

I can let go of all the stuff and all the weight. He gives us grace for what He has for us to do (2 Cor 12:9). The question is how much will we give Him (1 Pet 5:7-9)? If we hold onto it too, He’ll back off because we might get it twisted and confused that we had something to do with the ultimate outcome. Our letting go of the material and mental things that hold us back, allows us to see more clearly. It allows God space to move in our lives, where we’ve kept it filled before. 

I don’t know about you, but I want all that God has for me. I don’t want to be the reason that I miss out of His purpose and His plan. It can definitely be scary walking into the unknown but God is already there, so what is there to fear. Even when I don’t know, He does (Isa 46:10). 

I encourage you to take stock of your life and let go of those things (whether material, mental, or spiritual) that are holding you back and step out into your future with God. Given all the stories in the bible when God’s followers stepped out in faith (where He directed them) and were blessed beyond measure, I feel honored that He’d choose me for this particular journey. I thank Him that I’ll now be a bit lighter on this next leg of the journey. On your next leg, I hope you will be, too. Be blessed.

How to Forgive

A few years ago, I wrote a blog entry entitled “Who do you need to forgive?” I just re-read it and it was a good lesson in identifying the person(s) you need to forgive and why. If you need a little help with that, it may just bless you, so check it out.  

What I didn’t delve into was how to forgive. Forgiveness is easy to talk about but more difficult to do. That is compounded when you don’t really have a plan to follow. I’m no expert on the topic, but I have been in situations where it was hard to forgive an offense and I have sought help from the Holy Spirit in those cases to forgive and move forward. Between that and my study of the subject, I’ve found a few tips that may help you as they are helping me. 

Before we get too far, let’s recap what forgiveness is. Generally speaking according to psychologists, forgiveness is a conscious, deliberate decision to release feelings of resentment or vengeance toward a person or group who has harmed you, regardless of whether they actually deserve it.  Forgiveness doesn’t mean that you forget or condone the offence, but it does mean letting go of the anger that can be exceedingly corrosive in your life.  

So, if forgiveness is a choice, we can choose to do things that we may not really feel like doing. I’ve learned in so many areas of my life, my feelings don’t drive change. I have to make a conscious decision to act and then my feelings will follow suit. For instance, I never feel like exercising. I know I need to do it, but I don’t especially like it.  So in most cases, I do it despite my feelings not because of them. I make a conscious choice to get out of bed and work out. When I do, I always feel better when I’m done. My feelings follow my actions. That too is often how forgiveness works. We begin to act in forgiveness and then our feelings line up. 

So the first tip is to pray for those who’ve hurt you. I know you may not want to do it, or you may want to pray bad things happen to them or pray God’s wrath on them. No!  Pray that God will help you forgive them and that He will forgive and bless them (Mark 11:25). Jesus is our example. Even on the cross after He had been beaten and ridiculed and pushed and everything imaginable, He still asked God to forgive His enemies because they didn’t recognize what they were doing (Luke 23:34). He still showed love and compassion for those who hurt Him. 

The next tip is to remember how you have been forgiven. None of us deserve to be forgiven even when we apologize. It’s freely given from God when we ask, because God the Father, is love (1 John 4:16). His abundant loves pours out on us and we were directed by Jesus to love our neighbor as ourselves. We want to be forgiven, so we too must forgive. Just as God chooses to forgive us, we can choose not to hold an offense against another person who has wronged us whether they are sorry or not (Matt 5:43-44). 

Finally, we should consider how life has shaped the other person. I struggle with this one sometimes especially in a world where racism and sexism and abuse and hatred appear to be on the rise. But, when you think about how many people are “living their truth” having rejected the love of God the Father and God the Son, it makes me sad for them and more compassionate. People can say anything, but their actions tell the truth about who they are. If they don’t show love, then according to the bible they don’t know God (1 John 4:8). That’s His word, not mine. So, it makes me sad for them even in their cruelty or their hate, because they don’t have the peace or joy that knowing God the Father through our relationship with Jesus and the Holy Spirit brings. Frankly, I don’t understand how people function without them. But this leads me back to the first tip, praying for those who’ve hurt me. 

Remember, forgiveness is about you letting go of the burden and the weight of holding the offense against someone. It sets you free. So, do you want to be a victim or a victor? The choice is yours. 

Write the Vision and Make it Plain!

Habakkuk 2:2 tells us to write the vision and to make it plain. In order to follow that instruction, we must first understand what vision is. From my study, vision is a supernatural revelation from the Lord with can teach a spiritual truth or convey future happenings. So, one question is what is the Lord telling you about your life or your ministry or your career, etc.? What possibilities have you shot down without even really considering them? What is holding you back? 

Recently, I began crafting a vision for my new job or rather for my new region as a whole. I had to seek God for the possibilities of what could or should be. When I put it on paper, it didn’t completely resonate with me, so I had to tweak it until the meaning settled over me like a warm blanket. I needed to be comfortable and settled with the vision, understanding that to achieve it I would have to go outside my comfort zone. There was nothing easy about it except writing it down, and it wasn’t completely easy to articulate the vision. 

Some would say, “Just do it.” That might work, but if you don’t write the vision down, you’re dependent upon your memory of what the true vision was. You might hit it, but how far off might you be without having that evidence of the vision somewhere you can reference it. It’s the same for your goals and plans. If they are in your head, they are fragile and may get cloudy. Once they are on paper or your electronic notebook, you have something solid to lean on. When you get discouraged, you have something to go back to and can encourage yourself (1 Sam 30:6). When things aren’t going according to plans, you have something on which to focus to keep you on track. 

Writing the vision is the first step to real success. You can always go back to it as you move forward to see where you are in regards to the vision. It can become your measuring stick. As always, the Lord opens doors and windows, but we have to be prepared to walk through them. Writing the vision puts us in a place to recognize the opportunities when they come. It also helps to prepare us to take advantage of them. When we write the vision, we are expecting those doors and windows to open. We’re looking for them. 

If you haven’t done so, I challenge you to take some time and seek the Lord for His vision for your life or whatever aspect of your life you need to move in (Prov 3:5-6). I know I’m headed into an awesome adventure from pursuing the vision God has given me. I hope you have the courage to do the same. Write the vision so it’s plain to you and anyone else who needs to walk along side of you. 

Remember, even if it’s scary - we do it scared. God has us and He won’t let us go!

What Message Are You Sending?

I've recently been in leadership training and it was amazing. Much like an intense college quarter with assignments and classes and presentations, but so much more than that. One of the take away lessons was that our words create worlds. When we speak something, we or someone else gets instruction or encouragement or guidance and it paints a picture or takes us on a journey. 

Think about the last time someone read you a book or instructions for putting something together - those words created a picture in your mind or a movie as to how it would all come together. Our words do the same. That gives us a responsibility to be clear and concise and mean what we say. When we promise a child that we'll do something with them, we create a world of excitement and anticipation. What happens when we don't show up? They are disappointed and just a little less trusting of us the next time. We have eroded their trust. That doesn't just happen with children. What about when we speak poorly of people? What does that do to their self-esteem? We have to be careful to build up and not break down (Eph 4:29).

The Bible states that life and death are in the power of the tongue (Prov 18:21). Life and death are in our words. We speak things positively or negatively. We create worlds with our words. What words are you speaking? Are you always talking about how bad things are? If so, that is all you'll see. Are you speaking of the positives in life? If so, you'll see the half full glass and not the half empty one. No one is suggesting that you not be realistic or tell the truth, but there are different ways to describe the truth. 

One person may say it's a cloudy day, while another may say the Sun is just behind the clouds - both statements are true. But one sounds more optimistic. If the Sun is just behind the clouds, we can expect it to come out anytime. We are reminded it will shine again. Are you providing hope or despair with your words? 

Next time you are sharing with someone think about what you are saying and how you are saying it. Try to couch it in realistic optimism. Realistic optimism is the ability to balance out negative and positive things in situations, circumstances and people. We all need hope and joy. Let's use our words to bring as much of that as possible to the world.